With apologies to Crystal Gayle, et.al., here’s a little ditty I just whipped up in honor of the Blue Wave that’s coming:

Don’t It Make Those Red States Blue
(Sung to the tune of “Don’t It Make My Brown Eyes Blue”)

How long since the map’s so blue?
I know what’s come over you
We finally got a clue
And don’t it make those Red States Blue

Republicans can pack their bags
Forgive us if we’re none too sad
A new day dawns a brilliant hue
And don’t it make those Red States Blue

Eight years of secrets, Eight years of lies
Gave us no reasons, gave us alibis
Held us hostage to fear, then laughed while we cried
Gutted our freedoms, said God’s on your side

We’ll be fine when Bushy’s gone
We’ll just party all night long
America can Hope anew
And don’t it make those Red States
Don’t it make those Red States
Got to make those Red States Blue!

Don’t it make those Red States
Don’t it make those Red States
Got to make those Red States Blue!

Don’t it make those Red States
Come on all you Red States
Got to make those Red States Blue!

Just a little something to hum while you’re standing in line to VOTE this Tuesday.

Am I getting a little ahead of myself? Of course, I am. I want this change so badly, I can taste it. But to make this vision a reality, you must VOTE on Tuesday (if you haven’t already done early voting). I’m serious, people. We can’t stand another 4 years like the last 8. We can’t let the dream slip away because of a little rain or snow, or a few cops standing around the polling places. White, black, and every color in between, we’re all in this together!

Ooo! Ooo! What do you think of “I Can’t Stand McCain”, sung to the tune of “I Can’t Stand The Rain”?

I know, it looks a little weird. So if you didn’t get an e-mail from me, here’s what’s going on:

My friend Kris had, what I thought was an inspired idea, and I promised I would spread the word. I hope you will, too.

Let’s all go BLUE for the next week, between now and Election Day, and particularly on Election Day – especially if you live in a heretofore RED or “battleground” state! Like Florida. Or Virginia. Or Ohio (my actual original home state – Go Buckeyes!) Very simple, and doesn’t cost you a dime – wear the color BLUE everyday at work and at play, to indicate our desire for CHANGE.

It’s subtle, requires no conversation (unless someone actually notices and says something like, “Hey! You’ve been wearing blue all week – forget to do your laundry?”), no banner-waving – just a quiet statement that you demand CHANGE. It’s kind of a grassroots thing. Maybe folks will notice and will feel encouraged, empowered. Maybe I’m delusional.

Coincidentally, I’m wearing a blue shirt today, so I’m off to a flying start. Join me and spread the word by e-mail and blog. I’ll be blogging about it for the duration on Flamingo Musings and however possible on Flamingo Fotos, in fact, I’m turning my blogs BLUE for the next week, until Election Day.

Think of it as a meme. Come on – tag yourself. Let’s turn the States BLUE! Join me?

Many thanks to Hootin’ Anni for bringing this to my attention via her blog. The people who know Sara apPallin best, now confirm what the rest of us have been saying for weeks.

The headline:

Alaska’s largest newspaper endorses Barack Obama

Click here for the story

Oh, wait. Now, is that the unAmerican part of Alaska, or the antiAmerican part? Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann wants to know.

This is truly awesome! Just warms the cockles of my heart…

Okay, you Western Pennsylvanians – I’m not saying that Murtha was necessarily right when he said that, years ago, y’all were a bunch of rednecks, or that y’all are a bunch of racists. I really don’t think he meant it exactly the way it came out. But you’ve gotta admit — John McSame should really leave the off-the-cuff quips to someone who can actually speak the language without reading them off-his-cuffs:

Is there no one in the campaign who can tell Sarah apPallin’ what the Vice President’s job is? Or have they tried and she’s just decided to redefine the job description and the Constitution-be-damned?

C’mon, Sarah – you’ve had, like, 4 cracks at this since July. It’s not like you had to make a special trip to the Library of Congress – they make purse-sized copies of the United States Constitution these days. And it’s a lot easier to read than you might think:

Article I, Sec. 3: The Vice President of the United States shall be President of the Senate, but shall have no Vote, unless they be equally divided.

Article II, Sec. 2: In Case of the Removal of the President from Office, or of his Death, Resignation, or Inability to discharge the Powers and Duties of the said Office, the same shall devolve on the Vice President, and the Congress may by Law provide for the Case of Removal, Death, Resignation or Inability, both of the President and Vice President, declaring what Officer shall then act as President, and such Officer shall act accordingly, until the Disability be removed, or a President shall be elected. [Modified by the 25th Amendment]

Amendment 25:

1. In case of the removal of the President from office or of his death or resignation, the Vice President shall become President.

3. Whenever the President transmits to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives his written declaration that he is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, and until he transmits to them a written declaration to the contrary, such powers and duties shall be discharged by the Vice President as Acting President.

Don’t have a U.S. Constitution handy? There’s always Google. That’s what I did. Took me about 30 seconds.

Maybe it’s a function of age, but I never watch Saturday Night Live anymore. When I was in college, it was new, fresh, and even if the odd sketch fell flat from time to time, overall it was cutting edge humor. I just don’t think it’s funny anymore.

Over the years, though, there’s one aspect you could always count on to be funny, brutal, and on-point: SNL’s political humor. So during political season, we make a point of watching SNL – at least the opening sketch. The show usually goes over a cliff after that. That being said, if you missed it on TV, you absolutely have to watch their version of last Thursday’s Vice Presidential Debate between Joe Biden and Sarah Palin. This is SNL at its very best and destined to be a classic. It’s about 11 or 12 minutes long, so grab a cuppa “Joe” and enjoy!

<!–[if IE]>http://widgets.nbc.com/o/4727a250e66f9723/48e90c9ecf216c64/4741e3c5156499a7/8093f89b/-cpid/9b352bc621baa7ed

P.S. – Tina Fey should get a freaking Emmy for this. If they give them out for stuff like this.

–>

“Opening up the health insurance market to more vigorous nationwide competition, as we have done over the last decade in banking, would provide more choices of innovative products less burdened by the worst excesses of state-based regulation.”
— “Better Care at Lower Cost for Every American” by John McCain in Contingencies (Magazine of the American Academy of Actuaries (read, insurance geeks)) (emphasis added) September/October 2008

If his choice of running mate wasn’t enough to convince you of John McCain’s poor judgment, how about that? In light of the past week’s financial system implosion, McCain believes we should follow the same strategy with health insurance. See how well that worked out?

“I also know, if I might remind you, that she is commander of the Alaska National Guard. In fact, you may know that on Sept. 11 a large contingent of the Alaska Guard deployed to Iraq and her son happened to be one of them. So I think she understands our national security challenges…”
— John McCain speaking in Grand Rapids, Michigan on September 17, 2008, regarding Sarah Palin’s foreign policy credentials.

On that basis, I could have given him some names of women who have had those particular credentials for a lot longer. That must make them eligible for – oh, I don’t know – at least Secretary of State. Of course, it might have been more effective had McCain recalled that Palin’s son is in the Army – not the Alaska National Guard. Oh, yeah. And she can see Russia from her yard. Clears that nagging little doubt right up.

This will take some time, kittens, including the videos which you must watch for context. So get a cup of coffee (or tea, if you’re inclined that way), settle in and get comfy.

I received a string of e-mails from a friend of mine, today, urging me to vote for Barack Obama – as if I needed urging. A couple of them included videos and contained the usual plea to forward them to 10 of my friends.

One of the members of her e-mail list felt compelled to respond to each one in a manner I consider, well, textbook “Bush-y / Rove-y”. I knew what I was in for when, in the first of her responses, she referred to Fox “News” as “centrist media.” Hee hee hee hee! You can see why I couldn’t resist responding. Anyway, rather than bothering my friends (I only bothered her friends – hey, she started it!), I thought I would reproduce the exchange here. I swear that I didn’t edit her remarks in any way, except to break them up into more digestible portions to which I responded.

Here’s the first video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH0xzsogzAk

Now, here are her comments:

“Hahaha…Wow MSNBC? Liberal Media? New York times is a liberal newspaper. ABC and Lou Dobbs prefer Obama. There is no centerist media anymore. Fox is closest ive seen believe it or not. Watch centerist media. Because i am shocked to see how much people are sucked in by this liberal media storm. If there will be a fairness act for radio shows there should be one for the media too. Stop the liberal media shockwave. Watch fox. Thank you ”

…and my response:

You’re joking, right? FOX is centrist???

The same network who, just a few weeks ago referred to his WIFE as Obama’s “baby mama”??? For those uninitiated few of you, a “baby mama” is a street reference to the unmarried mother of a man’s children. Usually black. A “man” can have several “baby mamas”. It is not generally used as a compliment, and when used by white people, a racial slur.

Puhleeze! Fox “News” is known far and wide as the mouthpiece for Karl Rove, Dick Cheney and the Republican fear-mongers. Whenever the Republican Party and the right-wing religious fundies can’t debate an issue civilly – because they have no response – they deflect the country’s attention by fueling some irrational white fear, such as immigration. Fox can always be counted on to sound the charge. “Fair and Balanced” my left pinky toe.

Next video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7acdvJegOY

Here’s her rebuttal:

“There is a lot of untruth in this, plus a complete lack of ALL the facts.
Lots of people would not agree with this. It’s a baby, not a ‘thing’.
There are better options.”

And my response:

First, you didn’t say anything to refute the “untruths”. So, what are ALL the facts, dear?

Second, I’m sure there are “[L]ots of people [who] would not agree with this.” More about that, later.

Third, I don’t recall anyone using the word “thing”, so for those on this mailing list who did not watch the video, you shouldn’t give the wrong impression. As for when a cluster of cells becomes a “baby”, well, I’m betting there are about as many opinions about that as there are people on this mailing list. Maybe more. I’m entitled to mine as much as you are entitled to yours. That’s what makes the world go ’round.

While I think I may have heard McCain say that he is for a woman’s right to choose (at least in cases of rape, incest, health of the mother, etc.), there is no doubt that Sarah Palin is vehemently against it. Even in cases of rape and incest. She believes that birth control, not just abortion, is murder. And if she wants to hold her family up as a reflection of what “average American parents” go through on a day-to-day basis, we can all see how well preaching abstinence-as-birth control worked for them. Now we have an old-fashioned shotgun wedding to look forward to – a child marrying a child. Is that one of your better options?

Considering McCain’s age, the phrase “heartbeat away from the Presidency” takes on a literal meaning. Do I want a woman to be President? Hell, yeah! Do I want this woman to be President? Hell, no!

So just what are your “better options”? Leaving young people ignorant about the ramifications, health and otherwise, of having sex? If Bristol Palin had had access to information about birth control and STD’s, would we be having this particular conversation right now? Bristol’s got a wealthy and politically powerful base to support her and her child. Therefore, we should force a young woman of possibly limited means to carry a child she doesn’t want and either give it up for adoption or raise it, supported by the taxpayers? Oh, wait! That’s right! You’re against “welfare”! That’s another e-mail. Don’t worry – I’ll get there.

Now, for the “[L]ots of people [who] would not agree with this.” You know what? I’ll vote against abortion and sex education, too. On one condition: Pass a law that you, and each and every man and woman who rallies, marches, sends e-mails, signs petitions, preaches and protests against a woman’s right to choose, against government and private insurers paying for contraception, and against a child’s right to know, is required to adopt and raise every single child – black, white, brown, green or purple, including those we euphemistically lump together as “special needs” – resulting from these bans. All of them. Feed them, clothe them, educate them. On your own nickel. No help from the government.

When you and everyone who voices your viewpoint makes that commitment, I’ll reconsider.

And finally, the last e-mail:

If You were The Boss… which team would you hire?

With America facing historic debt, multiple war fronts, stumbling health care, a weakened dollar, all-time high prison population, skyrocketing Federal spending, mortgage crises, bank foreclosures, etc. etc., this is an unusually critical election year.

Let’s look at the educational background of the candidates and see what they bring to the job:

Obama:
Occidental College – Two years.
Columbia University – B.A. political science with a specialization in international relations.
Harvard – Juris Doctor (J.D.) Magna Cum Laude

& Biden:
University of Delaware – B.A. in history and B.A. in political science.
Syracuse University College of Law – Juris Doctor (J.D.)

vs.

McCain:
United States Naval Academy – Class rank 894 <out of 899 (meaning that, like George Bush, McCain was at the bottom of his class)

Palin:
Hawaii Pacific University – 1 semester
North Idaho College – 2 semesters – general study
University of Idaho – 2 semesters – journalism
Matanuska-Susitna College – 1 semester
University of Idaho – 3 semesters – B.A. in journalism

Now which team are you going to hire to lead the most influential nation in the world?

I broke this one up to address her “arguments” one by one. Hers are the statements in quotes:

“First of all, an academic education, with ‘head’ knowledge, does not make a person WISE. It mostly makes them arrogant.”

Really? You know, the idea in this country over the last, oh, eight years or so, that you have to relate to the President of the United States, that the President doesn’t have to be smart, that the President should be just like you and me, is bullshit. I want the man or woman with their finger on the button to be WAY smarter than me. I want my President to know “arrogant” things, like how to fix the economy that the last “President” flushed down the toilet. I don’t want a President who has to rely on shadowy influence peddlers to tell him/her what to think. I want an “arrogant” President, full of “head” knowledge – someone I can look up to and respect, not someone to drink a beer with. I’ve got friends for that.

“And HELLO, the democrats are the ones who constantly increase the federal spending for the federal programs, so we can support all the immigrants and people on welfare who don’t want to work or contribute.
And if those of us who work didn’t have to support the hospitalization & medical care of immigrants and those who don’t work, our medical bills & medical insurance wouldn’t be so high. Reality check, people.”

And HELLO, the Republicans are the ones who keep driving this country into recessions and depressions, taking perfectly robust economies and looting them with their tax loopholes and revisionist policies, making the rich, richer, and the middle class scrambling from paycheck to paycheck. It has ever been thus. After every disastrous modern-day Republican administration, this country had to be “rescued” by a Democrat. See Warren G. Harding, Calvin Coolidge, Herbert Hoover (now, there was a winner in the fiscal responsibility department!), followed by Franklin D. Roosevelt and Harry Truman. Richard Nixon and Gerald Ford, followed by Jimmy Carter. Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush followed by Bill Clinton.   Eisenhower might be an exception, but that may be either because a) no one actually remembers the Eisenhower administration, or B) it may be that he just didn’t screw up the post World War II economic boom that was already in place.  Otherwise, each and every Republican Presidency in the last 80 years ended in economic depression or recession. Each and every Democratic Presidency in that period resulted in economic growth and social progress.  Just how the Republican Party ever got the reputation for fiscal responsibility, I’ll never know.  It’s a historical paradox.

Medical bills and insurance are so high, not because of immigrants and social programs, but because of avarice. I’m sorry, is that word too arrogant? How about greed? Historically, Republican administrations have fostered cultures of greed and acquisitiveness. Remember the “Me Generation” of the 1980′s? Remember the movie quote “Greed is good”? Have you heard of the largest growth industries in this country today? They’re called Healthcare Fraud & Insurance Fraud. Dishonest individuals, doctors, lawyers, and yes, even insurance agents – all in various combinations, work together to scam insurance companies, looking for free money. Billing for tests never performed, fake accidents, drug companies charging ridiculous prices for medications, baseless lawsuits against doctors and hospitals, the list goes on and on. If the powerful lawyers’ lobbies in this country worked with, instead of against, lawmakers for meaningful tort reform, you’d see more reasonable healthcare costs. But if you’ve ever padded an insurance claim, you are also personally responsible for escalating costs. Reality check, yourself, girlfriend.

“And, in case you missed it, the Congress, who makes the majority of the decisions about spending and programs, is run by democrats, not Republicans.”

And in case you weren’t paying attention, the Democrats didn’t take control of Congress until the 2006 election, and weren’t installed until January 2007. Try again.

“And if we would execute more criminals, instead of spending millions of dollars trying to rehab them, with very little success, thanks to bleeding-heart liberals, our prisons wouldn’t be so full.”

You know what really amazes me? I have never known or spoken with or gotten a chain e-mail from a Right-To-Lifer who wasn’t also in favor of the death penalty. Let me get this straight: Every cluster of DNA has a right to live until it does something “criminal”, then you should kill it. Hypocrite.

“So before you attempt to blame the Republicans for the messes you believe we’re in, get your facts straight. Better take a closer look back at American history.”

So before you attempt to blame the Democrats for messes we ARE in, Cupcake, you’d better get your own facts straight. My husband and I are students of American history, and you don’t have to go far to find the facts. Try taking off your Rove-colored glasses.

But I do want to thank you. I’ve been a little dry for blog material, lately, aside from Project Runway recaps, and I intend to reproduce these little chats we’ve been having. Don’t worry – I won’t use your name.

Sincerely,
RJ

You know, I’m not going to touch the “suspicious birth” of Sarah Palin’s 5-month old Down’s Syndrome baby. Truth be told, while I’m sure there are exceptions, we are all familiar with Down’s Syndrome as a birth defect of children born to women over 40. So I’m just not going to go there.

Sen. Obama has stated publicly that his opponents’ families are off-limits, and especially that their children are off-limits and not relevant to the campaign. I agree. I have always felt that the behavior, sexual orientation, religions of politicians’ families are irrelevant to how that government official or candidate does or will govern. So I will not pick on Ms. Palin’s teenage-pregnant-out-of-wedlock daughter, either. Personally. That does not mean, however, that I will not pick on Ms. Palin and more importantly, Mr. McCain. High road? What’s that?

In fact, I find Ms. Palin’s behavior and demeanor most troubling. She is “pleased” at the prospect of being a grandmother at age 44. Can we imagine that a 17 year old girl and an 18 year old boy (except in the rarest of circumstances), are delighted to rush – shotgun style – into a marriage of political convenience? You can imagine the scene behind closed doors while they were figuring out what to do, right? The Republican spin machine is going at it full-force, is it not? They hope that this will cast Ms. Palin in the role of “a parent just like you”, facing the trials and tribulations of raising teenagers. And a special-needs infant, simultaneously. Does anyone, besides me, get the feeling that these poor kids – especially the poor son of a bitch getting shoved to the altar – are nothing but props to this woman?

Unlike you, however, Ms. Palin is running for Vice President of the United States. Unlike you, Ms. Palin – should Mr. McCain (G-d forbid) win this election – Ms. Palin would be the proverbial “hearbeat away from the Presidency.” If I thought Ms. Palin’s “family values” were suspect before, I’m sure as hell convinced of it now. She is sacrificing her child(ren) on the altar of political ambition. An offering to the Golden Calf, if you will.

As for Mr. McCain, does this not cast some pretty big doubts on his decision-making processes and judgment? Despite all the other old (and young) white dudes whose names were being dropped as potential running mates, it’s no great surprise that he really wanted a woman to put on his ticket. After all, the Hillary crowd would flock to anyone with a vagina, no? But everyone assumed it would be someone with a track record and a known quantity, like Kay Bailey Hutchison. As to the issue of experience, Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz of the 20th Congressional District (encompassing 29 separate municipalities in two counties here in Florida), has said: “My congressional district has more people than the entire state of Alaska.”

How thoroughly was Palin vetted before the decision to bring her onboard was made? Who peeked into her closets and decided that the ethical skeletons didn’t rattle loudly enough to worry about? Which bright boy wrote the definitive memo saying that it was a good idea to choose a funadamentalist uber-Christian, who thinks abortion should be banned – even in cases of rape and incest; that contraception is murder; someone who deliberately chose to bring a deveopmentally disabled child into the world and display this innocent infant and a pregnant teenager as her badges of integrity as casually as the American flag pin in her lapel, to “balance out the ticket”? And was McCain drinking Kool Aid at the time?

I know. I’ve asked lots of questions here, most of which will never be answered. But I think the most important question is: Why has no one called Children’s Services? ‘Cause you know that if the shoe were on the other foot the Rove-ian scum-mongers would have been all over it like white on rice.

I find the Republican double-standard amusing and frustrating at the same time. If she were a Democrat, instead of lauding Palin as the living embodiment of a working wife and mother who overcame the odds to pursue her career and struggles to be a good parent just like you and me, she would be vilified as an evil morally depraved self-centered slut who can’t stay off her back and can’t discipline her equally libidinous offspring.

I’m just sayin’.

I am so flabbergasted by John McCain’s choice as running mate, I keep tripping over myself, trying to organize my thoughts into a coherent post. So instead, I am posting this e-mail I received from MoveOn.org. It is coherent and hits on every point I wanted to make:

[Friday] was John McCain’s 72nd birthday. If elected, he’d be the oldest president ever inaugurated. And after months of slamming Barack Obama for “inexperience,” here’s who John McCain has chosen to be one heartbeat away from the presidency: a right-wing religious conservative with no foreign policy experience, who until recently was mayor of a town of 9,000 people.

Huh?

Who is Sarah Palin? Here’s some basic background:

• She was elected Alaska’s governor a little over a year and a half ago. Her previous office was mayor of Wasilla, a small town outside Anchorage. She has no foreign policy experience.
• Palin is strongly anti-choice, opposing abortion even in the case of rape or incest.
• She supported right-wing extremist Pat Buchanan for president in 2000.
• Palin thinks creationism should be taught in public schools.
• She’s doesn’t think humans are the cause of climate change.
• She’s solidly in line with John McCain’s “Big Oil first” energy policy. She’s pushed hard for more oil drilling and says renewables won’t be ready for years. She also sued the Bush administration for listing polar bears as an endangered species—she was worried it would interfere with more oil drilling in Alaska.
• How closely did John McCain vet this choice? He met Sarah Palin once at a meeting. They spoke a second time, last Sunday, when he called her about being vice-president. Then he offered her the position.

This is information the American people need to see. Please take a moment to forward this email to your friends and family.

We also asked Alaska MoveOn members what the rest of us should know about their governor. The response was striking. Here’s a sample:

She is really just a mayor from a small town outside Anchorage who has been a governor for only 1.5 years, and has ZERO national and international experience. I shudder to think that she could be the person taking that 3AM call on the White House hotline, and the one who could potentially be charged with leading the US in the volatile international scene that exists today. —Rose M., Fairbanks, AK

She is VERY, VERY conservative, and far from perfect. She’s a hunter and fisherwoman, but votes against the environment again and again. She ran on ethics reform, but is currently under investigation for several charges involving hiring and firing of state officials. She has NO experience beyond Alaska. —Christine B., Denali Park, AK

As an Alaskan and a feminist, I am beyond words at this announcement. Palin is not a feminist, and she is not the reformer she claims to be. —Karen L., Anchorage, AK

Alaskans, collectively, are just as stunned as the rest of the nation. She is doing well running our State, but is totally inexperienced on the national level, and very much unequipped to run the nation, if it came to that. She is as far right as one can get, which has already been communicated on the news. In our office of thirty employees (dems, republicans, and nonpartisans), not one person feels she is ready for the V.P. position.—Sherry C., Anchorage, AK

She’s vehemently anti-choice and doesn’t care about protecting our natural resources, even though she has worked as a fisherman. McCain chose her to pick up the Hillary voters, but Palin is no Hillary. —Marina L., Juneau, AK

I think she’s far too inexperienced to be in this position. I’m all for a woman in the White House, but not one who hasn’t done anything to deserve it. There are far many other women who have worked their way up and have much more experience that would have been better choices. This is a patronizing decision on John McCain’s part- and insulting to females everywhere that he would assume he’ll get our vote by putting “A Woman” in that position.—Jennifer M., Anchorage, AK

So Governor Palin is a staunch anti-choice religious conservative. She’s a global warming denyer who shares John McCain’s commitment to Big Oil. And she’s dramatically inexperienced.

In picking Sarah Palin, John McCain has made the religious right very happy. And he’s made a very dangerous decision for our country.

In the next few days, many Americans will be wondering what McCain’s vice-presidential choice means. Please pass this information along to your friends and family.

My only other comment would be this: How much more patronizing can you get? Does McCain and his “organization” truly believe that by putting a fascist beauty queen on his ticket that he’ll get those of us who supported Hillary?

I am voting for Barack Obama. While I was a staunch Hillary Clinton supporter, I live in the present, not the past. And I do not, whatever the Republicans may believe, vote with my ovaries.